OF SWEAT AND BLOOD

Most people love to lead a leisure life. But not too many would spend their sweat on it. So some cheat on others. The announcement that there is an opening in an international organization has awaken me of my tranquility. After a week of deep thought I wrote down my application and sent it to the appointed mail address. After a week I didnt receive any response and felt a bit disturbed. So I decided to give up my hopes.

Yesterday, I received a positive response. The international organization had considered my application and requested me to follow a written interview. A form was attached and I had to fill in the form. I filled the form right away and sent it. It was no longer than two hours when they replied to my mail and congratulate me. I was so happy until I found another mail that notified me that they would consider my application and would let me know as soon as they can. I am astonished by the fact that there were two contradictory mails. So, I decided to discuss it my friend, who happened to receive a positive confirmation earlier.

She was startled by this fact. We soon realized that there was something wrong with all these offers for they asked as to send some money for the induction program.This is the point where we both realized that they are nothing but a bunch of cheaters. My friend hurriedly went to the bank to cancel her wired transfer. Lucky enough, she could get her money back.

As with me, thank you Lord for reminding me that there is no free lunch. I have to get back to my current post and shed my sweat and blood to earn my life.

SAD AND HAPPY

My application to be part of an internasional organization has not received any responses yet. I sense that they have refused to hire me because of my age and my background that doesnt fit the demanded competencies. Anyway, this is what life is all about, sometimes you win and some other time you loose.

I presented some materials on change in a local company yesterday. They gave me quite an enormous amount of financial reward. An amount that went beyond my prices all this time. Im happy not because of the money, but simply because I feel that I exist.

I talked to a friend who managed to pass the entry test for the vacancy in the international organization. Deep down in my heart I'm happy for her. Life has been not really that good for her and I think she deserves to get that position. It will serve as an eye opener how my organization has been neglecting their best employees, simply because they couldnt catch up with the way those progressive people think.

I only have my dissertation to work on. Im going to focus on it. And I have my family to take care of, yes financially I have to take care of them. Sometimes I feel it's unfair... because none of them have ever...ever given me just a little bit of attention, be it on my birthday or during christmast time. I have never found a small gift from my family me on christmast time. Sometimes I believe that they just want to make a surprise for me... so I probably would get it by tomorrow ...and I waited...tomorrow...the day after tomorrow and on the third day..I stop hoping that I will get something from them and I cut off my illusionary dream.

Hah..happy and sad, they are part of me...and they are part of everybody... im happy and im sad...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

Yesterday was my birthday. Goodness, time flies. I received quite many birthday wishes from friends and from people that I dont remember anymore. Anyway, it's there, thank you for your kind attention and most of all thank you for your little prayer. They do mean a lot, especially when it is based on sincerity.
Like many years that have gone by, I expect to see surprises when I got up, but again like many other years, the surprise is not there. Life just goes on, like yesterday, the day before yesterday and many other days in the past. So I wiped off my expectations and put my boring "attire" to face the day.
This morning, I woke up rather early, and stay in bed. The perenial question was there again my head. It had been there yesterday, on the way home from the dentist. We both met on the training event prior to the 1985 SEA Games.
me: "What was your first impression on me when we first met?"
hubby: "You have your own world, you hardly hang around with others. You went straight to your room and not an easy person to get close to."
me: "Is that so?" ( I was hoping that he wanted to make some corrections on his statements)
hubby: "yes", he responded abruptly.
This morning as it came back, I remember the psychologist statement:
psy: "It's really suprising to know that you are a Public Relations practitioner. You dont seem like you have the call to do this profession."
me: "But I did, and i'm happy with it."
psy: "yes, but you could be happier if you do other things."
I wonder if I really have been such a personality that hard to deal with. The only thing that I know, I enjoy doing things on my own and I love to explore this life alone.
God, thank you for allowing me to inhale another year of fresh air. Thank you for allowing me to explore the painful and the beauty of life. Bless me Lord!